Friday, November 18, 2011

How many different forms of transportationcan you name?

It's for school, we're learning about the Industrial Evolution and the Transportation Evolution...I have already named:





Feet,


Swimming,


Bicycles,


Roller blades and skates,


Scooters,


Skate boards,


Pogo sticks,


Horses,


Camels,


Donkeys,


Elephants,


Hand gliders,


Hot air balloons,


Blimps,


Airplanes,


Helicopters,


Space shuttles,


Submarines,


Ships,


Subways,


Railways,


Street cars and trolleys,


Buses,


Semi Trucks,


Automobiles,


-and-


Motorcycles,





Are there any others you can think of?

How many different forms of transportationcan you name?
MOTORBIKE


ROCKET


HANDS-N-KNEES


CARTWHEEL


HOVERCRAFT


HYDRAFOIL


HELIUM BALLOON


PICKUP TRUCK


BUCKBOARD


STAGECOACH


RAPPELING


SAILBOAT


SAILPLANE (GLIDER)


TRACTOR


PARACHUTE


BABY CARRIAGE


LUNAR LANDER


CABLE CAR


SKIS


SLED


SLEIGH


REINDEER


SWINGING (A LA TARZAN)


MAIL


CANNON


ELEVATOR


ESCALATOR


DUNE BUGGY


SKI-LIFT


SURFBOARD


PORPOISE


DOLPHIN


KILLER WHALE


WINCH


RICKSHAW


GOLF CART


GO CART


CATAPULT


SLINGSHOT


BUNGEE CORD (this is a stretch)


TZUNAMI (albeit you don't go where you want to)
Reply:I got a good one - WHEELCHAIRS
Reply:Sleds, Sleighs, farm tractors, Hay wagons (as hay rides), Horse and Buggy (the Amish still use them), and my favorite as a child: a little red wagon.
Reply:segway, ziplines, parachutes, unicycles, tricycles, ultralights, canoes. Thats about it.
Reply:Bullock Carts


Rickshaws


Cycle-rickshaws


Hand pulled Rickshaws


Tuktuk
Reply:someone else's back,wigwam,riding lawnmower,cow,back of police car,taxi,surfing,
Reply:What about the obvious one....WALKING


What is the live expectancy for people under 5 feet tall?

On average, do short people have shorter lives than tall people? I have searched for this information and havent had any luck finding any information. With other mammals, the larger species lives longer. Example, an elephant lives longer than a mouse. The heart beats faster per minute in the mouse compared to an elephant.

What is the live expectancy for people under 5 feet tall?
well in school we learned about 85-90 years
Reply:But a big elephant would not necessarily outlive a smaller elephant of the same species, nor would a mouse's size indicate if it would live loger or not as long as another of its species.





Height (except when related to genetic disease) does not determine a human's life expectancy either.
Reply:Contact a company that sells life insurance (the home office, not an agent). They will probably tell you that it makes no difference. Comparing different species is not going to give you useful information about differences within a species.

wesley

How many elephants can yo fit in a Mini?

4........2 in the back and 2 in the front


What did the man say when he saw four elephants in a mini coming over the hill?











Look here come four elephants





How do you know when an elephant has been in the fridge?











Foot prints in the butter

How many elephants can yo fit in a Mini?
These were funnier when my 5year old told me them
Reply:can someone tell me when i should start laughing
Reply:Very good Johnboy


Nice and clean love it
Reply:Don't listen to them, I love the elephant jokes!
Reply:the old 1s r always the best
Reply:depends if u can get 1 in at all
Reply:Whats that brown stuff between an elephants toes?


Slow Natives.





Where is an elephants sex organ?


In its foot, if it stamps on you your F....d
Reply:ha ha hardi ha
Reply:3.14
Reply:Funny Ones !!! Liked them !! Thanks !! Hope to hear more from you !
Reply:Whoever said the old ones are the best obviously hadn't read this, sorry.
Reply:WHATS GREY AND GOT A TRUNK?


WHY! .....AN ELEPHANT SAYS YOU ?





NO !


ITS A MOUSE GOING AWAY ON VACATION.
Reply:I think the questions has already been answered by your goodself. Therefore, I will pass this over.
Reply:I seriously did not get these jokes!
Reply:thats it, get it off your chest
Reply:mini van? mini skirt? miniature golf ball?
Reply:good one!
Reply:I hate to tell you this, but these are old.... no .... very old..... no in fact ancient jokes which we told as children about 40 years ago. Still I will give you a





HA HA





for old times sake!!
Reply:feel better?
Reply:whats the difference between an elephant a flea and a monkey ?


A flea can get on a elephants back but a elephant cant get onto a fleas back


some one says what about the monkey and you say well thats when you come in to it
Reply:haha....elephant jokes .


sweet~~~
Reply:5 out of ten
Reply:has the joke started................ please wake me when u start......


What can i do to reduce the swelling in my feet?

I know swollen feet in pregnancy is normal but they'r really really bad and its spreading up my leg. Iv taken my midwife's advice and have rested with my feet up but it seems to be getting worse. Bathing them in cool water hasn't helped either. I look like the elephant woman lol

What can i do to reduce the swelling in my feet?
Like you said swollen feet and hands are normal in pregnancy but if it is excessive it could be pre eclampsia. your midwife will check ur urine for protein and check to make sure your blood pressure's not high as they are both signs. As are headache's and blurred vision. Try resting with your feet higher than your head, cutting out salt and wear loose shoes (or flip flops) and just generally relaxing. They'l go back to normal once you give birth tho x
Reply:Drink lots of water, minimize your salt intake (both to keep water retention down) and keep those legs propped up when resting. Don't forget to walk every 2-3 hours (minimum) to keep the fluid from pooling in your feet and to increase circulation. Good luck!!
Reply:I agree. Keep those puppies propped up. And also avoid excess salt! (sorry if you are craving anything salty) Also keep an eye on it and talk with your Dr. Yes, it is normal, however, it can also be serious so keep on top of it! (with my first pregnancy I couldn't even wear shoes because my feet were so huge *lol* but it goes away pretty quickly after delivery)
Reply:Propping them up, soaking in cool water and keeping yourself indoors and staying cool is the best things you could do. If it's not working for you, you may want to talk to a doctor could be a sign of Preeclampsia
Reply:well i would say hand stands but in your condition !!!!!!! elavate your legs and get someone to look after you !
Reply:go to the doctor tomorrow you may need to go into hospital. take some ibuprofen it is anti-inflamatory.
Reply:hi well wot you could do is to put your feet in some cool water for a long time then put some cream on your feet that sothes your feet and put some cunfortable shose on that mite work
Reply:RING THE MIDWIFE AGAIN AS THERE IS A CONDITION CALLED PRE ECLAMPSIA DONT BE ALARMED BUT THIS CAN BE DANGEROUS AND RESULT IN INDUCING LABOUR! ALLS THEYLL DO IS CHECK YA BLOOD PRESSURE AND YOUR URINE TO SEE IF THERE IS ANY PROTEIN PRESENT! THE ONLY OTHER ADVICE I CAN GIVE IS TO REST ALOT AND WHEN SITTING PUT YOUR FEET UP ABOVE YOUR HEARTS LEVEL! ALSO SLEEP ON YOUR LEFT SIDE GOOD LUCK!
Reply:First evaluate your salt intake. Salt and summer heat are often the culprits behind swollen feet (edema) during pregnancy.


Cut down on salt and drink extra liquids mainly water. Keep cool by sitting or laying down next to a a/c vent and put a fan facing you. Put your feet up .


One thing I did when I was pregnant during the summer or hot days was take a lukewarm/cold shower and then lay down in front of a fan. I did that up to 3x a day and was in heaven.


I have a ten year old chihuahua who has severe health problems?

My dog has severe skin problems and nothing we have tried has helped she is also deaf from chronic ear infections.Right now she cannot walk two steps without scooting and she is already raw from her tail to her belly and feet this is after a special treatment yesterday for her skin problems.She is also getting nasty with the other dogs and my husband.She has pacadermatis and her skin gets like elephant skin and raw and her nails grow over and under each other and this is very painfull also.I think I am being selfish by keeping her alive.The question I keep asking myself is am I keeping her alive for me or her?Any one got any help for me. Bertie

I have a ten year old chihuahua who has severe health problems?
I think you are doing everything you can to help your dog. She obviously is not well. I would suggest seeing another vet first to see if there's anything you can try to cure her skin problems. if you can do anything to make her better, that will probably improve her mood. But if you have already tried everything you can to help her, and she's just in pain, it may be time to say goodbye to your dog. It is very kind of you to notice how she is feeling and consider what is a difficult decision. If it ends up that there is nothing you can do to help her, I believe you'd be making the right decision to put her to sleep.
Reply:awww...poor little thing. I hate to say it but it does sound like you need to make a choice here and it has to be what is best for her. It does sound like she is in pain and very uncomfortable. I'm sure you do not want her to live like that. Good luck to you and God Bless.
Reply:You not gonna like this. Your dog is suffering. Have it put down. The dog will not suffer from this. You will, obviously, but don't you think you might be cruel by keeping such an animal alive? Sounds rather selfish.


Bite the bullet. Do it - for your pet's sake - PLEASE...
Reply:The answer is out there somewhere to your dogs problem. Her aggression is down to her uncomfortable state. I would think that her problems are down to her immune system. look up food that is good for the immune system %26amp; add it to her daily diet. If that doesn't help then it is time to call it a day. If she's not happy %26amp; enjoying life %26amp; you have done all you can it is the kindest thing for her. She won't know anything about it. You will feel peace for ending it before she lost her dignity.
Reply:i recommend going to the vet ASAP, don't worry, there will be a solution.
Reply:If you are unsure about her quality of life, why dont you discuss it with your vet. In a dogs latter years, your vet can be your best friend. Let him guide you he obviously feels she has some quality of life or he would'nt have prescribe treatment yesterday, without giving a good talk to you.





If you feel the treatment she had yesterday has made her condition worse, telephone your vet and tell him. It might be a case of it takes time to work and gets worse before it gets better, check with him.





If she is able to eat and walk a little to go into the garden to do her business and does'nt yelp in pain, take your time.





You are obviously a responsible pet owner to be posing this question and probably know better than anyone if she is deteriorating.





Dont make any rash decision, discuss it with your vet.





I really feel for you, as I have gone through this many a time, having taken in stray cats over the years and it is heartbreaking to see them grow old.





You will know when the time comes, that she's had enough. Life is so precious so take you time and be sure in your own mind before you make a decision with your vet.





God Bless you and your dog.
Reply:Pachydermatitis usually refers to a fungal infection: malassezia pachydermatitis.





The infection is often secondary to other causes. Before having your dog put to sleep, I would make sure he has been checked for:


- Parasites


- Bacterial and fungal infections


- Hypothyroidism


- Cushing's disease


- Allergic disorders ...





I recommend you make an appointment with a veterinarian specialised in Dermatology. Ask your local vet and I am sure he will be delighted to help you find the appropriate person.





If despite all this, the dog is still in severen disconfort, then humane euthanasia may be considered.





Good luck
Reply:Only you can answer that question Bertie but i suspect your keeping her alive because you love her immensely and cant imagine your life or your home without her and i fully understand where you're coming from. She's snapping at you and your husband because she is sad and upset about her condition, we're all guilty of that when we're ill aren't we? But, does that mean we have no right to be here? I think not. As you've tried just about everything there is for her skin, its time to look at other remedies. Buy a small pot of Sudocream, i say small because its dear and may not work, if it does, buy the big one, she's worth it. Smother her skin with the sudocream and leave it on to soak in. It will take a few days and a few applications to make a difference but what have you got to lose? Also, try nappy cream! Theres one on the market that begins with M but i cant for the life of me remember its full name sorry. Its dear also i'm afraid but do try it. It costs about £4 - 4.50 for a small tube, is pale yellow and stains everything it comes into contact with so be careful where she sits and lays when its on her. Its amazing stuff Bertie, its got antiseptic, antihistamine, tiny amounts of antibiotics and lots of healing properties in it. Its the best on the market for baby's nappy rash and if its good enough for them -! Theres also an emulsion cream / lotion that humans with eczema apply when they're in the bath and it moisturises the skin an awful lot. You can get it from chemists i think but if you cant, ask your vet to put it on a prescription for her. If she lets you cut her nails, do them every few days to keep them short or ask the vet if he wil do them this often for a nominal fee. If nothing on earth works for her and you've exhausted every avenue, maybe it would be kinder to let her go but try anything and everything first, then you'll know you did everything on this earth for her but it didn't work. I hope you find something that works for her x
Reply:Ya know, as much as I hate to put a dog down and I like to give them every chance, it really sounds like your dog is not happy, especially since she's getting nasty with the ones she used to love.





Ask yourself if she is getting any enjoyment out of life right now. There is your answer.
Reply:I know what your going through.I had a dog i loved very much for 9 years and she developed the skin problems, alone with a few other things. If you look at it this way you are keeping her alive for you.The hardest thing to do is to put her down.But to keep her alive and in this condition is painful for her. I put my dog down, it's rough but it's the humane thing to do.Don't make her suffer anymore than she is now.But that's your decision.


Working with zoo animals, is it possible to bring home contagious virus or diseases?

My wife recently started volunteering at an acquarium and small zoo. She has bee in contact with reptiles, amphibians, fish, bearcats, rabbits, bats, birds, their enviorments and their foods. Yesterday I noticed our feline was not well. He has since recovered, but I thought it may have been something brought home from the zoo. I have heard that salmanilla is often found on iguanas and turtles, that true? What about foot and mouth or other type viruses? Its a samll zoo so there are no large animals like elephants which I have been told carry hepititus but I am interested in preventing the preventable. Please advise.

Working with zoo animals, is it possible to bring home contagious virus or diseases?
salmonella is commonly found in the waste material of most reptiles and amphibians. The best way to avoid it is to wash one's hands after working around them.





other pathogens are very rare but can be deadly if aquired. the best example is "parrot fever", a virus which is fatal to both birds and humans. This is not "bird flu", but a much more virulent species of virus.





mammals can host a number of contageous virus diseases. rabies is the best known and even herbivores like cattle can aquire it. cattle, sheep, goats and other ruminants can also carry anthrax, a bacterial disease.





"pox" viruses are quite capable of being passed from animals to humans. cammel pox and monkey pox are good examples. cowpox was used as the first vaccine against a human pox virus known as smallpox. dairy maids aquired an immunity after contracting a case of much milder cowpox.





rodents carry hemmoragic fever viruses. these viruses are amoungst some of the most deadly of human virus diseases. the African ebola virus is a member of this family. another species seems to be spread by southwestern deermice. this is a lung infection which can kill its victims within 24 hours of contact.





Bacterial infections are frequently due to foriegn strains of E. coli, a bacterium which inhabits the large intestines of mammals. Some strains of this bacteria are harmful to humans. the 157 strain is responcible for food poisoning. other gut bacteria can cause cholera. hog cholera can be passed to humans, I believe.





besides diseases, there are also paracites. the worst of these appear to be flatworms. these creatures are specialized to reproduce in one host and mature in another entirely different species. molluscs are frequent hosts. the common planobarius aquarium snail is host to the bilhartsia paracite. there are many species of bilhartsia with varying degrees of severity. this organism reproduces in the human liver, causing swelling and bleeding. the adults then pass eggs and the larva infect pond snails. when humans drink infected water, the cycle starts again. fortunately for fish keepers, no aquarium snail is now infected and the chain has been broken. giant African land snails have not been domesticated long enough to break the cycle however, and most are infected with lung paracites which can infect humans. these enormous land snails are great zoo attractions, but now illegal to import because of the risk of disease transmission.





most zoos have highly trained vets to keep their equally highly valuable animals healthy. of course, costs factor much more in small operations, so take this into account.
Reply:yes it is possible to bring home diseases! I would reccomend her changing clothes in the garage (if you have one), putting those clothes straight into the washer, then heading straight for the shower. There are many diseases emerging each day that are unknown, even in a clean environment such as zoos and aquariums.
Reply:I have heard of animals that carry diseases, and some things like parvo can be tracked into an area just by walking through it. That is why they ask for so many animals here to be up to date on vacinations. If your cat is up on all of her shots, she should be ok for most things. I would say though if your wife is working with this kind of animals though, she just needs to make sure that she takes off her shoes before coming into the main part of the house and washes up well as soon as she gets home, including changing clothes. That will prevent most anything she could carry. I know some exotics can carry parasites and communicable diseases, especially birds and you have to be careful around them, and just make sure you keep clean. There are tons of resources on these, so if you go online, you can find out exactly which species carries what if you are interested. The main prevention stop though is at the wash up. As long as she is keeping clean and disinfecting any open cuts or sores carefully, she will be just fine, and so should all of you. Best of blessings,


Maraleh

loan

Elephant Bar Bathroom Scandal in Burbank?

Elephant Bar Bathroom Scandal In Burbank?


Wwas there the other day around 10:30 a.m., and went into the women's restroom, yes the women's restroom, and saw two pairs of men's feet in the handicapped stall with the door partially opened.





I gasped, and said "Isn't this the women's restroom?" And the two men came out without shame or anything. They were the workers there getting it on. I could tell by their uniforms which were black shirts and black pants.





Is this illegal, and wouldn't management have to know about this sexual activity?





This made me sick, and I would NEVER go to eat their again

Elephant Bar Bathroom Scandal in Burbank?
On a health code level, it's not technically illegal (I work for the health dept., and I know how inspections work). HOWEVER, sex in a public place (like a restaurant bathroom) is considered to be lewd and lascivious conduct, and is a SEX OFFENSE in the state of CA.





You can report them to management and they will likely be fired. Or you can go up one step and call the cops, in which case, they can be put in jail, get put on the sex offender registry for life, and if Prop 83 holds up, get stuck with a GPS monitoring device for ever and ever and ever.


Watching trees grow can cause blue spots to form on the soles of your feet but only dogs can see them, true?

my dog keeps barking at my feet I'm worried. at first i thought it was cause i had put a giant elephants trunk on them but after i took the trunk of he was still barking. HELP! i knew those trees were bad news.

Watching trees grow can cause blue spots to form on the soles of your feet but only dogs can see them, true?
OMG.....my wife had the same problem....it is very easy to cure.......................................






























































EAT the Dog
Reply:Call a doctor and ask them soon:)
Reply:Just maybe in time your dilemma will pass, In the mean time don't dwell on it find another constructive hobby like genetic marble profiling.
Reply:What a charming thought. Utterly delusional, but charming.
Reply:Only if marshmellows rode motorcycles.


Elephant joke . Part 1 - why do ducks have webbed feet?

To stamp out forest fires.








(Star if you like this, please)

Elephant joke . Part 1 - why do ducks have webbed feet?
Ha ha i love random jokes :-)





What has two legs and bleeds?


Half a dog





Why does Suzy have no eyes?


Cos a seagull gauged them out





Why did the pilot crash the plane?


Cos the pilot was a loaf of bread





Why the Mike fall off the bike?


Cos someone threw a fridge at him





Why did Suzy fall off the swing?


Cos she had no arms





Star for ya!!
Reply:Hahah! thats pretty clever =]


Estimate the pressure exerted on a floor by the following:?

(a) one pointed chair leg (51 kg on all four legs) of area = 0.03 cm2





(b) a 1550 kg elephant standing on one foot (area = 820 cm2)








Thank you so much!

Estimate the pressure exerted on a floor by the following:?
I'm not a Math or Pysics person but I know 100% that the chair leg has WAY more pressure than the elephant foot. A high-heel will have even more pressure than the chair leg!!

Textiles

Circus elephant goes mad. how come?

hi. i am in southern asia. i just came back running as fast i could from a local circus. in the circus, an elephant was to perform some tricks to entertain the crowd. as soon as the handler hit the whip to the ground to signal the elephant to dance, the elephant instead grabbed his handler by the trunk and threw him with such force that the handler was tossed at least 60 to 70 feet away. unfortunately the handler couldn't make it. the elephant then started breaking anything that he sees and then charged at the audience. he grabbed some unlucky few from the audience and severely mauled them. by then everyone started running away and there was lots of screaming everywhere. i too ran away as fast as i could and made it back. the elephant was on a rampage. what happened? why did he act this way in the midst of a circus performance?

Circus elephant goes mad. how come?
it was either in 'must' when they get aggresive, or he was abused to train him, particularly with a whip
Reply:because elephants are usually abused at circuses so he or she was making a break for it
Reply:the elephant had peanut for lunch, and it was a salted.


What can I do to teach the ppl upstairs a lesson next time they wake me up at 5am by being noisy?

Heya, last night at 5am suddenly loads of noise started upstairs, they randomly put on 1 song really loudly, then after that I heard someone, who must be the size of an elephant, jumping up and down and walking around thudding their feet, it was so loud my ceiling was creaking. Then they started playing guitar and wailing along to it, after about half an hr a taxi pulled up, someone yelled like a caveman out of the window at him, then I heard the fat guy fall down, get up and run down the stairs and get into it. I've never heard footsteps from upstairs before so this friend of theirs must have been huge cos it was soooo loud. When I got up this morning I noticed he'd left the front door to the building wide open! After that there was no noise but by this time I was wide awake. They did this the night before but last night was worse. I was just about to put on some loud music so they got the hint, but luckily then that fat guy went home. Any suggestions for if it happens again?

What can I do to teach the ppl upstairs a lesson next time they wake me up at 5am by being noisy?
Why do you want to teach them a lesson? They did nothing wrong as far as they know. Go upstairs the night before and politely ask them if they would try to keep the noise down at 5am , you are trying to sleep.


Your neighbors being noisy once in awhile is nothing to complain about. Get some ear plugs
Reply:I dont think you can TEACH them anything.





First, consider talking to them and explaining the situation





Second, it sounds like you in an apartment building. Check with the landlord to see what policies, if any, apply to this situation





Thirdly, if those two don't work contact the local police agency to see if they help alleviate the problem.
Reply:If you live in a council house or housing association, make a complaint.


You could also make a recording of the noise and complain to your environmental office.
Reply:Complain to the landlord, if that dosn't work call the police, if that dosn't work call the noise abatement people in.
Reply:Firstly, only bang on your own ceiling with a broom if you are a plasterer...not recommended!


Secondly, playing your own music loud will have limited effect on someone above you, but it'll really p*ss off YOUR downstairs neighbours!


My advice ( other than simply fronting up to the f*ckwits and telling them exactly what you think of them ), would be the age-old trick of a doggie-doo in a paper bag, set fire to it, knock on their door %26amp; watch from a safe distance!!
Reply:Call the police and tell them there are minors and they have drugs. Tell them you seen them with it and alcohol.
Reply:Why don't you try approaching them, nicely, and explaining that it has annoyed you. Say why, what and where and when. Than explain that if it happens again you will be contacting the local EHO. Start keeping a diary of the noise nuisance so you ahve something to show the authorities. But try the personal approach 1st. You might not need to do any more than point out that they have annoyed you.
Reply:Firstly, reporting it to the police is pointless, they don`t care.


Don`t you have any friends who could pay them a visit - nudge, nudge :-)
Reply:WOW, First I'd like to say that I had to chuckle at the humor in this. I know there wasn't suppose to be any, because if this happened to me I would be very upset. But you had humor there..(sorry). But, to keep yourself out of trouble, next time when the noises are so loud you can't hear yourself think, call the landlord, he's the one that allowed these "cave' people in there and also call the police. I'm not a cop calling yo yo myself, but sometimes you do what you have to so your not the one in trouble. If you get along with them, or what have you, and if you think this can be done, go to them and let them know it's not appreciated to be getting woke up at 5am. If you think there is not a snowball chance in hell this will resolve anything then take other measures. Each time they do this call the person that ownes the place along with the law. I'd like to tell you what I would do, but it is very much against the law. Hope you have a better night!
Reply:You know what my cousin does? He takes the stick end of a broom and hits the ceiling with it. Next time they make noice, hit the ceiling with a broom in the middle night. That'll make them angry and hopefully they'll get the picture.
Reply:easy!! next time you hear noise..go upstairs knock on door and blast fat b@stard with shotgun...go back to bed and have a nice sleep
Reply:Hope the suggestions above work for you.





I lived with noisy neighbours for years and they drove me nuts!!! One of them used to leave his cd player on a timer so that it would turn itself on!!!!





When you bang on the ceiling............they bang back.


When you turn up the radio................they turn up theirs more


When you inform the landlord...........they twist the story around


When you call the cops......................they pretend they'll never do it again


When you try to take revenge...........it's on like donkey kong





Find out if you can sue them for some amount in court. My tormentors didn't care about "slaps on the wrists" from landlords and the police!!





But interfering with their beer budget would have gotten their attention. Hey, I could have used the money for therapy. Now I'll just have to settle for using it as material for my novel.
Reply:i think your original idea of blasting loud music back at them is brillaint! You could open your window and start screaminig manically, treat it as a bit of fun if you can, try and do to him what he's doing to you, it sounds likes you live in a flat so you could go up to his door and smear butter on the door handle that would be funny!
Reply:My first step just out of stupidity and ignorance would be to wait until they are sleeping and find the loudest music you can, play it as loud as you can, and leave the apartment. But on the truthful side of things, I've dealt with this more than once before. Both times I involved the landlord first. I did so because one group of people were just scary as hell and i didn't want to have to deal with them and i did so the second time because i was actually coworkers with the individual. If that doesn't work, call the police. Its a public disturbance and you don't have to deal with it. Good luck.
Reply:Call the police or local council 'noise nuisance' hotline.





It's why you pay taxes...to use these services.
Reply:Next time they are making noise at 5 am. Go up stairs and knock on the door. Politely explain to them that you do not have to get up for several more hours and you would greatly appreciate if if they could keep the noise down. Most likely these are just rude people who do not think about others living in the building. Often if you bring it to their attention in a nice way - they will be more considerate.





After that - if it happens again - call the land lord.
Reply:If these people are awake at that time of night they must be sleeping late in the morning so that's the time to make some noise to get your own back,but this is likely to start a competition to see who can make the loudest noise.


I reckon the best way to go about it is to go and introduce yourself and try to make friends then you could ask them politely to keep it down,even if it's just when the fat bloke's there,you've got more chance of getting it sorted then.


It's not a good idea to have enemy's when you live in flats,you're too close together and the chances of crossing paths with them is greater.


Swollen feet during pregnancy?

yesterday we help my sil to move into her new house and I didnt really do anything since im 35 weeks pregnant, i put together a dresser, fix the food and put the food in the fridge after my hubby and my in laws moved it. Anyway this morning my feet are HUGE!!!!!! they look like elephant feet!! what can i do to make them go back to normal? this never happened to me before!

Swollen feet during pregnancy?
I'm experiencing the same thing!





My doctor says it's normal this late in pregnancy, and more so since the weather's starting to get warmer (where I live anyway). Drink plenty of water, and elevate your feet. According to my doctor though, your feet need to be elevated really high to do any good. Just using a couple pillows won't do much to help the swelling...
Reply:It may be edema, which is when you swell up during pregnancy, due to extra fluid collection in your tissue.





Try rest on your left side, put your feet up when you can (elevate them)


Stretch your legs, rotate your ankles, wiggle your toes, flex your feet when sitting


If you sit for a long period get up and have a walk around, same with laying down for a long time.


Wear comfortable shoes


Drink lots of water, try and do some light exercise


Eat well avoid sodium and junk food.





Just be careful if it continues call your doctor or midwife as it may be a sign of preeclampsia. But try and rest, you seemed to be very busy yesterday and i think you deserve it!
Reply:badly swollen feet, legs and fingers can be an indication of pre eclampsia. however swollen feet is a very common thing in pregnancy. id mention it to your midwife to be on the safe side.





in the meantine, you can put cool packs on your feet, and keep the elevated when you are relaxing and wear loose shoes and no shoes at all when about the house
Reply:What you're experiencing is edema — that's when excess fluid collects in your tissue. It's normal to have a certain amount of swelling during pregnancy because you're retaining more water. Changes in your blood chemistry also cause some fluid to shift into your tissue.


In addition, your growing uterus puts pressure on your pelvic veins and your vena cava (the large vein on the right side of the body that carries blood from your lower limbs back to the heart). The pressure slows the return of blood from your legs, causing it to pool, which forces fluid from your veins into the tissues of your feet and ankles.


Edema is most often an issue during the third trimester, particularly at the end of the day. It may be worse during the summer.


You can help relieve the increased pressure on your veins by lying on your side. Since the vena cava is on the right side of your body, left-sided rest works best.


After you have your baby, the swelling will disappear fairly rapidly as your body eliminates the excess fluid. You may find yourself urinating frequently and sweating a lot in the first days after childbirth.





A certain amount of edema is normal in the ankles and feet during pregnancy. You may also have some mild swelling in your hands.Call your midwife or doctor if you notice swelling in your face or puffiness around your eyes, more than slight swelling of your hands, or excessive or sudden swelling of your feet or ankles. This could be a sign of preeclampsia, a serious condition.Also call your caregiver if you notice that one leg is significantly more swollen than the other, especially if you have any pain or tenderness in your calf or thigh.


Here are a few tips:


• Put your feet up whenever possible. At work, it helps to keep a stool or pile of books under your desk. At home, lie on your left side when possible.





• Don't cross your legs or ankles while sitting.





• Stretch your legs frequently while sitting: Stretch your leg out, heel first, and gently flex your foot to stretch your calf muscles. Rotate your ankles and wiggle your toes.





• Take regular breaks from sitting or standing. A short walk every so often will help keep your blood circulating.





• Wear comfortable shoes that stretch to accommodate the swelling.





• Don't wear socks or stockings that have tight bands around the ankles or calves.





• Try waist-high maternity support stockings. Put them on before you get out of bed in the morning so blood doesn't have a chance to pool around your ankles.





• Drink plenty of water. Surprisingly, this helps your body retain less water.





• Exercise regularly, especially by walking, swimming, or riding an exercise bike. Or try a water aerobics class — immersion in water may temporarily help reduce swelling, particularly if the water level is up near your shoulders.





• Eat well, and avoid junk food.





Try not to let pregnancy swelling get you down. The sight of your swollen ankles will probably add to your feeling of ungainliness, but edema is a temporary condition that will pass soon after you give birth.


The ant and the elephant. What do you think?

One day, while an elephant was walking through the woods, she got a thorn stuck in her foot. She saw an ant passing and asked him to help her get the thorn out.





The ant asked, "What do I get in return?" The elephant replied, "If you get it out, I'll have sex with you."





So the ant gets busy taking the thorn out. When he finally gets it out he looks up at the elephant and says "OK it's out, are you ready?".





The elephant thinks, "Hey, what's a little ant gonna do anyways?" The ant climbs up and starts to work away. Just then a monkey overhead drops a coconut on the elephant's head.





"Ouch" screams the elephant, and the ant responds, "Yeah take it all *****."

The ant and the elephant. What do you think?
haha cute... ha
Reply:Holy Crap! That was truly awesome! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! LMAO!!!
Reply:hahahahaha love it very funny
Reply:Haha! Seriously funny. :-D
Reply:ROFL... very good...
Reply:thats funny! 10/10 lol!!!
Reply:brilliant

barber

In stuch on this math problem please help me?

The pressure that divers experiences as they descend comes from the weight of the water resting on them, Ocean water exerts a pressure of .44 lbs/in^2 for each foot that a diver descends.





An average bull elephant weights 6.5 tons. Suppose that all of this weight is exerted on a one-square-feet surface. At what depth will the water pressure on a one-square foot surface be equivalent to the pressure of the bull elephant?





Thank for your help.

In stuch on this math problem please help me?
At a depth of F feet, the pressure in PSI would be 0.44F





One ton is 2000 pounds, so the "elephant" pressure in PSI is 6.5 * 2000.





To find out how deep it would have to be until the water pressure was as forceful as the elephant pressure, set the two expressions equal to each other and solve for F.





0.44 F = 6.5 * 2000


Will you help Thai elephant?

The average day


for most Bangkok


elephants starts at about 4 p.m.


when the streets are still so hot


that they burn


the bottom of their feet


and finishes about 2 a.m.


Thai elephants are endanger from walking on the street in Bangkok .There are organization that help them like


please take a look


www.elephantnaturefoundation.org/


www.bring-the-elephant-home.nl/en/

Will you help Thai elephant?
I swear I will never ride one.
Reply:I'd be careful of organizations like the ones you listed, although most are probably well intentioned, many exist only to elicit donations from unwary animal lovers like yourself. I live next door to where two elephants that are used to entertain tourists are kept. They have a huge field where they live when they aren't "working" and are alllowed to roam freely, the two elephants seem very happy and well-adjusted, and they do not go to the tourist areas until well after dark when the asphalt has cooled down. When they arrive at their destination, the tourists buy natural fruits from the Mahout and are then allowed to feed the elephants, while this may not be the ideal life for the elephants, from what I can see, they are treated very well, are well fed, very content and not abused in any way. Life in the wild may be the best thing for the elephants, but it certainly appears to me that my two elephant neighbors have a pretty good life.
Reply:I agree with Gerald J 's comment.





You need to see the whole issue in context and from Thailand perspective and NOT from the Westerner's point of view. It is easy to yell "cruelty" based on standards of "luxury" zoos and animal welfare groups in more affluent countries. A lot of animal organisation may start with good intention but emotions can get in the way of what it truly good for the animal. Make sure we are doing what is best for the animal - FROM THEIR PERSPECTIVE.





Your comment "for most Bangkok elephants starts at about 4 p.m. when the streets are still so hot that they burn the bottom of their feet and finishes about 2 a.m." makes it sound like Bangkok are over-run by hordes of exploited elephants. THIS IS NOT TRUE. I have been to Bangkok many many times and the whole time I have seen elephant twice in Bangkok - and this is only after dark.





Elephants are treated quite well in Thailand actually. All these "cruelty" assertion is because people don't see the issue from the Thai perspective.
Reply:It's not as bad as you say,


There is a group South of Chaing Mai, Cann't remember exactly were, but they call themselves "Freind of Asian Elephant" There is a well run Elephant hospital there, The workers there are volunteers
Reply:The change in the country's lifestyle has pushed many elephant handlers and their elephant out of work. It is good that there are organisations like these that try to help them still get a job. But the elephants need to be looked after properly and not be overworked. Some kind of foundations will be necessary in places where the elephants are required to help in the tourist industry. Maybe some kind of funding for the elephant owners so that the elephants need not have to work too long hours.
Reply:That's great, I will check out the links.





Why, oh why, doesn't the government do something about all the animal cruelty that goes on here?





I don't get it. I would like to raise awareness to this fact. If the government started getting some heat from outside countries, perhaps it would wise up.





There are so many animals suffering here, I can hardly stand it. I love hearing about people who are trying to save them. Thank you.


Elephant joke anyone???

A feller goes to the doctors the doctor says"hello what can i do for you?" to which the man replies in an embarrased tone "I cant tell you it's too embarrassing" to which the doc says"I have been in the medical proffession for so long I no longer get embarrassed or shocked by my patients" so the man drops his trousers and turns round to show the doctor his bum hole, which was battered and bruised and about two foot wide. "jesus christ!!"said the doctor "what on gods earth happened to yer ******???" the man replied "I was on safari in africa and in the night I was unfortunate enough to be raped by an elephant" the doctor scratches his head and says"but I have allways been under the impression an elephants penis was very long and very thin,not two foot wide" " I know said the feller but the bast4rd fingered me first"

Elephant joke anyone???
LMFAO.....nice one babes
Reply:That was great!! But kindda gross to picture it...
Reply:That's a classic. One of the best I've heard to date.
Reply:LOL the funniset joke EVER
Reply:that was pretty funny
Reply:Good one.!!!
Reply:hahaha good one.
Reply:randy bugger that elephant and what a hole 10/10
Reply:LOL ! :-) Good 1.
Reply:yeh, good one, i liked that ... made me laff


If you are going to be killed by a wild animal, which one will do it the quickest?

You can be in the sea, or even attacked by a grumpy elephant, gorged by a charging rhino, but none of man's inventions should intervene. Direct attacks only. Nothing like sneaky rabbit burrows that can cause you to go plummeting over the edge of a cliff. Drowning counts if you get your foot stuck in a giant clam or attacked by a monster crab.

If you are going to be killed by a wild animal, which one will do it the quickest?
lol Why am I answering this?! I'm amused by the question, I guess. ; )





Well, drowning isn't an instantaneous death. It takes a few minutes, so that's out. If a tiger or lion attacks from behind and snaps your spinal cord, that isn't instantaneous either. You don't necessarily die from a severed spinal cord; you'd be paralyzed and completely helpless while the giant cats then took their time ripping open your gut to get at the soft, warm flesh within. Not quickly enough.





Hmmm...being trampled by an elephant would be pretty quick. Having one of those feet come down on your mid-section would be like having a car dropped on you. Though, if it comes to that, people can and do survive for a while having been pinned underneath a vehicle. So maybe that's not the quickest still.





I think something large, violent, and powerful would have to do the trick. Perhaps a giant grizzly bear? One swipe to the head can take your noggin clean off in an instant.





Too bad we don't live back in the days of dinosaurs. I'm pretty sure one chomp from a T-Rex would be enough to transport you to the afterlife in an instant. It'd snap you clean in two with one bite. Yep! That's my choice. T-Rex.
Reply:lol I didn't know that about jaguars. Thanks for the vote! : ) Report It

Reply:A jaguar is small compared to a tiger in bulk and strength..In fact a tiger's blow will crush the skull instantly more often than not.This has happened in Indian forests and related by Jim corbett and Kenneth Anderson in their adventures.


Anyway thank you. Report It

Reply:Brown Bears do hunt down and attack and kill people when hungry. Cougars may be more successful though. Polar Bears are hunters.





A Jaguar is big enough to kill a feeble simian, but only half the size of a Tiger. The Tiger is the most formidable, and one paw swipe may send you to eternity. Report It

Reply:All predators have to beware of getting injured by their prey. This is why the Tiger may go for the jugular instead of the nape. Death can be through suffocation instead of a broken neck with big cat attacks (elementary research only). . Report It

Reply:lion that beheads you with one swipe. Plus it'd be a cool story
Reply:As a rule, you're best off with one of the big cats. I Tiger would be my choice. They put a very swift very powerful bite on the neck, snapping the cervical spine. It doesn't get much quicker or neater than that.


Incidentally, the famous Doctor Livingstone survived an attack by a lion, and said that a feeling of complete calm and wellbeing came over him,and he felt no pain at all at the time, despite being quite badly mauled. Inexplicable, but comforting, heh?
Reply:A shark biting mi head off
Reply:Cone snail is pretty quick.
Reply:Hi. A jealous husband?
Reply:Tigers attack from behind and sever you spinal column.


That must be quick?
Reply:A King Cobra will send you on your way in no time.
Reply:A bear, sitting on my back while I was sleeping in campping.


Fast!!
Reply:well if i had to die by a wild animal i'd pick an elephant, b/c just one stomp to the head by a 8 ton animal would kill u instantly
Reply:snake bite that works instantly or a poisonous spider.whatevers quickest.
Reply:piranhas are quickest
Reply:My bets are on one of the powerful neurotoxin producers- either a banded sea snake or Chironex sea wasp "jellyfish". The sea wasp is so powerful victims cannot swim to shore, but the sting is said to be excruciating for a minute. On the other hand, the bite of a powerfully neurotoxic snake is said to produce feelings of peacefulness and even euphoria just prior to complete heart failure. Peaceful, quick and painless- yep, that's the way to go.





My reasons for not choosing others? Large cats like to play with their food, and I can only imagine the terror you would feel as you are being run down by an elephant or a rhino, 2 of the more dangerous land mammals. Hippos can eviscerate you rather quickly with their tusks, and actually cause more deaths than crocodiles. Not sure how quick evisceration would be, though. I am not partial to drowning, therefore don't like the idea of a crocodile attack. Suffocation from a wasp allergy does not appeal to me. Sharks tend to slice chunks away, which can be very painful if not done in very cold water. Perhaps an orca, which can take off my head in a single bite? That wouldn't be too bad. You still have the fear response, though. I think I'll stick with my first answer- a sea snake bite. Painless death with potential for feelings of euphoria is quite nice.
Reply:i dont want to be killed by a wild animal, and neither do i want to think about it.
Reply:A lethal stroke of the paw by a tiger will relieve you instantly without you being aware of what is happening.


Tiger is the best hunter on land.It can stalk you unawares unlike a lion.


Even if swallowed alive by a sea animal you will be struggling for life at least for a few minutes.


And the deadliest poison will take a few minutes to kill you.
Reply:A politician.
Reply:Mike Tyson
Reply:Well, one thing for sure, if I ever get swallowed by an elephant, I'm going to run around til I get "pooped out"

rene

It was the elephant!?

One night during a supper of cabbage rolls and baked beans a father and son were breaking wind something fierce and gassing the poor mother and sister half to death, every time one of them would break wind, his father would say "Did you hear thunder?" and the son would blame it on the dog. After a while the mother closed the windows and door and told her daughter to put out the dog. She said "Now that should be the end of that rude dog and the thunder" Suddenly the air was shattered The father said "Did you see that elephant?" The boy said, "Yeah it went under the table!" The mother said "Now stop humoring your father don't be silly!" The son said "Honest Mom it was an elephant! Raised Dad off his chair nearly a foot it did!"

It was the elephant!?
haha, I love jokes about gas! If y'all knew me you would probably tell me to stop talking about toilets, butts, and turds. Did you Know John Crapper invented the toilet? It explains a lot, doesn't it?! haha, nice one dude
Reply:ahh!





its good to know that people these days still appreciate a good old fart joke!





good one mate.
Reply:he he =)
Reply:heheheheheheh that wa fuunnyyyyy
Reply:;)
Reply:I don't get it.





http://www.rumdesign.com/wrong/......





.


Did anyone see a short video clip(reality) of a guy sweeping up straw and such at the back end of an elephant?

It looked like he was working for a circus or something, and paying to much attention to what he was sweeping on the ground, and not enough about the elephant that was starting to sit down.In short, as jumbo sat, his trainers head was pushed up into Jumbos butt.The elephant,(I'm sure as surprised as the trainer), quickly stood back up again, at which point, the struggling trainer, his feet now off the ground,slid back out again. The clip ends with the trainer on hands and knees, vomiting, and whoever was working the camera, hysterically laughing. Has anyone else seen that clip? I know that it's real because I saw it myself long ago, but can't recall any details about it!


PLEASE, SOMEONE MUST KNOW!!!

Did anyone see a short video clip(reality) of a guy sweeping up straw and such at the back end of an elephant?
I saw it once. they showed it on a show called "maximum exposure"


Do elephants really have good memories?

I don't usually like these heart-warming stories, but this one is truly interesting...





In 1986, Mike Hogan was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from North-western University. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air.





The elephant seemed distressed so Mike approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it.





As carefully and as gently as he could, Mike worked the wood out with his hunting knife. The elephant gingerly put down his foot. The elephant turned to face the man and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Mike stood frozen, thinking about being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned and walked away. Mike never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Do elephants really have good memories?
That was great. I kind of have a thing for elephant jokes. Whenever somebody introduces me as "really funny" I tell a really crappy elephant joke to lower their expectations a little. Now I have a follow up elephant joke that is actually funny and will get them by surprise.





Why did the elephant wear a green felt hat?


So he could tip toe accross the pool table without being noticed.
Reply:maybe cuz they migrate every year
Reply:I don't really laugh out loud very often but this one made me laugh out loud very much





thank you
Reply:It is said that almost all mamals dream about the day that just passed...Animals can't think rationally...This is a fact...they rely on instinct.





That was not the same elephant,that's clear...even if it was it would of killed him anyway because elephants,if you can believe this,are affraid of small things(especially if these small things move)...So the elephant was just trying to protect himself...





So the answer is NO...elephants don't have memory at all:D


I hope this helps you!


Good luck with your search!
Reply:idk


A mouse and elephant joke?

A mouse is walking through and jungle. After a short while, he hears something obviously in pain. He goes to investigate and comes to a clearing. Lying in pain is an elephant. The mouse asks 'whats the matter?' The elephant replies 'I have a thorn in my foot and it hurts, please pull it out'. The mouse suggests some kind of deal. He says 'ive always wanted to s**g an elephant' The elephant agrees as it only a mouse and it must have a small d**k. So the mouse gets up behind the elephant and starts going at it. Up in a tree a monkey is watching the events and starts laughing. The monkey laughs so hard that a branch breaks off a tree and hit the elephant on the head 'aarrrggghhh' screams the elephant. To which the mouse shouts 'thats it, take the full length b*tch.'

A mouse and elephant joke?
Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha Ha Ha! Ha! I JUST CAN'T STOP LAUGHING!!! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha Ha Ha! Ha! Ha!





Great joke!!!
Reply:haha
Reply:lol
Reply:ha ha old but good
Reply:hahahahaha.......
Reply:old but sill funny...:-)
Reply:ha ha ha funny


thanks for a laugh


10/10
Reply:heard this before... but still make me laugh...
Reply:Hahaha.
Reply:Old joke but funny, but it's not appropriate for this website where 8-12 year olds are reading this stuff. Save it for the bars.
Reply:hahaha this is a funny





avena


webmaster


http://www.siteadvertising.org
Reply:I dont care how old it was ,it made me laugh and still am.
Reply:lol...very good
Reply:Classic joke. :)





Some old jokes are always funny. Have a star!!





lol





:D

email

What can i do to make my severly swollen feet and legs better?

38 weeks pregnant noticed for the past week my feet and legs get really swollen to the point its uncomfortable to walk. What can i do to relieve some of the swelling. They are bad i know its normal but mine go beyond the normal range i think. My pharmacist said mine are beyond swollen. Help what can i do Dr. said its normal but its hard to function with elephant legs.

What can i do to make my severly swollen feet and legs better?
I do hope your doctor has actually seen how swollen they are and has checked for pre-eclampsia.





If so and all is well, the only thing you can really do is keep your feet elevated. Cut down on salt intake, and things that are high in sodium...like soda. Make sure you are drinking enough water, and put your feet up some more. You don't have long to go now.
Reply:This is NOT normal to be that swollen. You need to go see the doc and get checked out. You can see your regular doc for this. Also get a pair of support stockings at your drug store. Have the pharmacist explain how to put them on but you MUST put them on before you swing your feet out of bed every morning. Elevate your feet ABOVE your heart when you are sitting or lying down.


If a pink elephant was flying at an altitude of 2000 feet..?

Would it beat the average air speed of an un ladened swallow?

If a pink elephant was flying at an altitude of 2000 feet..?
No. A pink elephant is not very aerodynamic. Everywhere at his flappy ears, his wrinkled skin and his funny body protrusions swirls of air would form, slowing down his flight.





The faster he tried to fly, the more powerful those swirls would get. Near speed of an unladen swallow, these swirls would detach themselved from the elephant and form tornados.





That being said, I can only speculate that all the tornados over Kansas are caused by flying pink elephants. These are probably created by drunken hallucinating people in Texas and then drift north with the upper atmospheric winds.
Reply:I think it's a question of weight ratios!
Reply:Would that be an African Swallow or a European Swallow?
Reply:It would depend if the pachyderm were creating wind sheer.
Reply:Must be a European swallow. African swallows aren't migratory.
Reply:It would, assuming you want the elephant to stay airborne. It'll have to fly fast enough to 'fall' with the curving of the Earth. Think of it like a satellite, they need to go very fast or else they'll fall from their orbit, so in essence their falling, but because of their tangential speed, they don't drop in altitude from the Earth.


Elephant and the Humming Bird?

In Africa a lady elephant was looking for some water when her foot got caught in a big hole. A humming bird saw the elephant in distress and came to her aid.





Humming Bird: "Can I help you?"


Elephant:: "I wish you could, your a bit small but maybe you can get help"


Humming Bird: "Ok. I'll gather up some rhinos and elephants and they can push and pull you out"





Moments later help arrives, rescuing the thankful elephant.





Elephant: "What can I do to ever repay you little bird"?


Humming Bird: "I've always been curious what it would be like to do it with an elephant, if it's alright with you."


Elephant: If you think you can have fun, go for it.





So the humming bird huvers to the backside of the elephant and starts to do his thing. A monkey in a tree sees the action and gets all hot and bothered. So much so, shakes a coconut from the tree hitting the elephant on her head.





Elephant: "Ouch, Ouch!"


Humming Bird: "Am I hurting you dear? Sorry".

Elephant and the Humming Bird?
Unexpected punch line... funny.
Reply:EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!... SICK!!!!!!!!!!!! NASTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PERVERT!!!!!!!!!!!!! WIERDO!!!!!!!!!! (i cant think of anything else 2 say. lol! not the joke.)
Reply:u cant b serious...u have to b attention deprived
Reply:Cute joke,I would say.
Reply:hmmmm its ok


How many tattoos do you have and of what?

I have 3. Stars that wrap around my side, an elephant on my shoulder, and a heart design I drew up on my foot.

How many tattoos do you have and of what?
I have 2 and they are of my babies feet from their birth certificates
Reply:Thank You Report It

Reply:I HAVE A CROSS IN MEMORIAL OF MY DAD..N A BUTTERFLY TRIBAL ON MY LOWERBACK..
Reply:a small mermaid with a face like my granddaughter. on my left arm


a nickel sized heart with a sewing needle and thread through it. right shoulder.
Reply:I have one for my mom on my right leg, a band on my left ankle, a fist that says 'fight back' on my left calf, cherries on the back of my neck, a fireball on the middle of my upper back, a girl on my right arm, a portrait of my dad on my right arm and a chest piece with two swallows, seven stars and two banners that say 'true love.'
Reply:i have a tribe tatue and i just got it 7 days ago!!!
Reply:I dont have any...yet.
Reply:none
Reply:I have 5 all together. A very good size guardian angel, a dolphin with my daughters name, a old school butterfly,a battle wound and a rose with my last name for my dad.
Reply:Butterfly top of right foot, tribal top of left foot. Cat face rt ankle, purple rose left ankle. 1/2 moon on stomach. Thumper the bunny on my a$$. Butterfly on the back of my neck and a large circle of roses and thorns between my shoulder blades.
Reply:i have 8 tattoo's , a tribal cross , I.N.R.I , 407 , JY , Armband , R.I.P JOSH , and praying Hands , if u want pics go to my myspace , myspace.com/automechanix5
Reply:none.
Reply:I have a Punisher skull, and an eye with claws on my right arm. Blue and red dragons, and one of two dragons fighting on my right. I have a barcode on my neck. A German WWII military patch between my shoulders(I am not a nazi. I just liked the patch.). An M.C. Escher painting on my lower back of two hands drawing each other. An electrical outlet on my left foot. And a dragon's eye on my tounge. I am nowhere near done yet.
Reply:I have 11 tats.


I have "ohana" on the back of my neck, a phoneix on my right forearm, a libra sign on right shoulder, a aries sign on my left shoulder. a egyption eye on my right and left hip. a large dragon on my inner left ankle, a rose on my outer left ankle, a chiense charter on my innner and outer right ankle and a white tiger on my lower back
Reply:I've got 14 tattoos so far all pretty large. if you're really interested i'll list them off.


Traditional sacred heart with swallows chestpiece,


giant koi fish on my left calf, happy bunny on inner ankle,


star w/ rose on right inner ankle, psychopathic rydas on outer ankle, skull with sombrero over a knee surgery scar,


giant ganesh half sleeve, giant "hey diddle diddle" nursery rhyme in pictures half sleeve, calla lilly with scorpions on the back of my neck, "elven elven" tattooed as a ring around my finger, evil sock puppets tattooed on my inner wrists, and ani difranco lyrics tattooed on my inner forearms above the sock puppets.
Reply:I have a thistle on my right hip in honor of my Scottish heritage.
Reply:i have one.. its on my shoulder blade..and its a moon with a shooting star going across the moon.and smaller stars around it
Reply:John Lennons' self portrait on my ankle


A dog paw print, which I designed, on the back of my neck.


An ambigram of the word 'LENNON' on the side of my left hand.





I've never heard of a tongue tattoo! Cool!


And an Escher pic? I actually considered the birds/fish one, but decided it was too likely to not end up perfect!
Reply:i have 5 and counting. lol. i have a 2 different butterflies on my back, a rose on my stomach, dolphins along with my husband and our sons name on my ankle and stars on my foot. everyone of them is special to me and has a meaning of it's own.

Beauty Home

Elephant riddle #2: Why do elephants paint their underside of their feet yellow?

So they can hide in the custard.





Star if you like this one. Thanks


(more to come)

Elephant riddle #2: Why do elephants paint their underside of their feet yellow?
Well I was going to say so they could hide in the custard after I read how do you tell if an elephant has been in the custard?





What did the elephant do when he hurt his toe and couldn't walk?


*


*


*


*


He called the toe truck.
Reply:LOL. Yes, it is. Thank you. Report It

Reply:All I know is that they paint their toenails red so they can hide in cherry trees. When they make trunk calls they call collect. I shot an elephant in my pajamas because he was stretching them out. Any further discussion would be irrelephant.
Reply:Now that's what I like to see. A joke that really makes sense.
Reply:Quit while your ahead.


Ever seen an Elephant?

A rich guy was looking for excitement so he decided to put an ad in the newspaper. The ad said, "I will give $10,000 to any person that can make my elephant jump."





So the next day, people came from all over the world to try to get this elephant to jump. There were even hypnotists who tried, but no one could get that elephant to jump.





Then a guy drives up in a blue Corvette and said, "Are you the guy with the ad?" The rich guy replied yes. Then the guy asked, "Is that your elephant?" "Yes." The rich man replies. Then the guy went back to his car.





He returned with a 2 by 4. He walked behind the elephant and hit the elephant right in his balls! That elephant jumped a good 8 feet in the air. The rich guy, amazed, handed him the $10,000. The guy then got in his Corvett and drove off.





The next week the rich guy decides to put another ad in the paper. The ad said, "I will give anyone $20,000 to make my elephant turn his head from side to side." The man had seen his elephant's head move up and down but never from side to side.





People come from all over the world to try to get this elephant to make his head turn from side to side. No one could do it. When everyone left, the same guy in the same Corvett drives up.





He walked up to the elephant and said, "Do you remember me?" The elephant nodded his head up and down. Then the man asked, "Do you want me to do it again?" The elephant then shook his head from side to side frantically.

Ever seen an Elephant?
i can do better than loser french guy in crovette.... i drive larmargoni car and i come up to elephant then i tied a live mouse on the top of the arrow then i use bow to shoot the arrow(with mouse tied on the front of the arrow) at elephant's butthole and im sure elephant jumps THOUSAND FEET up .....








Next time. the elephant will shake his head no no no no no no no when elephant sees azzurri man with lamargoni car drives up on the elephant's owner's driveway...another easy 20,000 dollars for azzurri man
Reply:LOL
Reply:thanks for the 2 points
Reply:Thnx 4 the 2 points!
Reply:Good one
Reply:have u forgotten inzaghi??





u dont mention his name here
Reply:nice story..
Reply:yes at the zoo with my husband and little boys
Reply:no..But u wanna See my "Elephant" It hella big and fat
Reply:HA-HA.... That's funny.
Reply:hahaha that was funny. I like that story! Do you have any more?
Reply:sweet
Reply:thats cool. but elephants have nuts ?


Who would win in a fight. 3 baby tigers or a Baby elephant?

the baby tigers can shoot 6 foot 2x4's from their mouth every 3 minutes. the baby elephant has the ability use an adult mamoths trunk.

Who would win in a fight. 3 baby tigers or a Baby elephant?
a three armed baby from asia
Reply:tigers
Reply:Tigers.
Reply:gimli
Reply:I am gonna say the tigers:)
Reply:what is a 2*4 gonna do to a elephant maybe hurt it a little but the tusk could spear the tigers


You like elephant jokes?

There was this guy who bought an elderly circus elephant. Alas, he couldn't afford to feed it. He'd never seen an elephant jump with all 4 feet off the ground. So he started a contest: entry was $10, and the first person to get the elephant to jump with all 4 feet off the ground would get $50, 000. All sorts of people tried, but nobody could get the elephant to jump. Finally, this little guy arrives in a limousine. He's carrying a baseball bat. He walks up to the elephant, swings the bat, and crunches the elephants ***** pretty badly. Needless to say, the elephant jumps, and the owner pays out the $50, 000. Unfortunately, the owner had barely collected enough to cover the prize, so he ran another contest. He'd never seen an elephant swing its head back and forth as if to say, "no." Same deal as before: $10 per entry, $50,000 prize. Lots of people try and fail. Then the little guy shows up in his limousine again, pulls out his bat, and walks up to the elephant. He says, "Remember me?" The elephant nods yes. The man then holds up his bat and says, "Want me to use this again?" The elephant nods his head rather emphatically no....

You like elephant jokes?
Once again the man delivers! I'm lmao. Do you have times during the day when you are serious? Star on ya one mo' time.
Reply:Glad to hear it. All I see is jokes. Just wanted 2 know what was underneath if I scratched the surface. thx Report It

Reply:forgot to ceck that one Jake...





"The elephant NODS his head rather emphatically no...."





But not bad otherwise
Reply:pay up!!
Reply:hope no animal lover is listening


hahahaha
Reply:Funny! 100!
Reply:Poor guy lolz!








What's a person gotta do to make a living these days eh?!





lmao!
Reply:awww poor elephant!!!!!!! lol
Reply:never allow the little guys to go near you. They HURT!!
Reply:I wonder if the elephant is planning anything for the little guy?
Reply:good ! keep em up. star as always.
Reply:URGH!!!!!!
Reply:LOL LOL . Poor guy he just cant get a break thanks .
Reply:Lmao. These little guys man you can never trust them. That is one smart elephant. star.

augmon

Elephant task....?

A rich guy was looking for excitement so he decided to put an ad in the newspaper. The ad said, "I will give $10,000 to any person that can make my elephant jump."





So the next day, people came from all over the world to try to get this elephant to jump. There were even hypnotists who tried, but no one could get that elephant to jump.





Then a guy drives up in a blue Corvette and said, "Are you the guy with the ad?" The rich guy replied yes. Then the guy asked, "Is that your elephant?" "Yes." The rich man replies. Then the guy went back to his car.





He returned with a 2 by 4. He walked behind the elephant and hit the elephant right in his balls! That elephant jumped a good 8 feet in the air. The rich guy, amazed, handed him the $10,000. The guy then got in his Corvett and drove off.





The next week the rich guy decides to put another ad in the paper. The ad said, "I will give anyone $20,000 to make my elephant turn his head from side to side." The man had seen his elephant's head move up and down but never from side to side.





People come from all over the world to try to get this elephant to make his head turn from side to side. No one could do it. When everyone left, the same guy in the same Corvett drives up.





He walked up to the elephant and said, "Do you remember me?" The elephant nodded his head up and down. Then the man asked, "Do you want me to do it again?" The elephant then shook his head from side to side frantically.

Elephant task....?
thank you i was having a bad day till i heard that thanks you rock
Reply:hahahaha~~!!


smart man, poor elephant though hihihi~~!


xx
Reply:That was just awesome thanks!
Reply:awww!! poor elephant!!





lol. gd one though =D
Reply:hahah








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lol
Reply:ahah that was pretty good.
Reply:Wow, lol. It was cute. Haha. XD
Reply:Funny! 10!
Reply:Awww, poor lelephant :-(
Reply:Nice. You know elephants are the only mammal that can't jump? Also elephants have an excellent memory.
Reply:Lol,lol,lol,10/10, * .


Hilarious and thanks for the lol.
Reply:Hahahahahahahahahahahaha


Love it*
Reply:lol - nice one! Thanks for the great laugh and as a result, a Star (*) for you!
Reply:lmao, that's awesome
Reply:lol star
Reply:hahahaha excellent.
Reply:lmao! That one's really funny. Cheers then.
Reply:oldie but goody
Reply:ha really funny lol i really was lmao!!! classic
Reply:Nice one. You gets a star.
Reply:It's not that great. It's a rip off of "The Horse and the Jar of Coins" joke.





~Damp


What are elephants feet called?

My teacher wants us to find out what there called

What are elephants feet called?
Elephant footies
Reply:in former times they were turned into coal scuttles - not any more thank goodness
Reply:They are called hooves. One foot is a hoof. And two or more (plural) are hooves.


Why have Yahoo put a completely inappropriote ad on news pages regarding Maddie?

If you read the news pages regarding the disappearance of little Maddie in Portugal, you will see that Yahoo have included an advert which shows a man creeping around outside a ground floor bedroom where a female is seen throught he blinds/shutters inside. The man is then squashed by a large elephants foot, but does anybody else agree that it is bad taste and should be removed??? Maddies parents and the police are trying to raise as much internet support as possible so imagine the number of people who have seen this ad and would agree with me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please Yahoo, do something about it!!!!!!

Why have Yahoo put a completely inappropriote ad on news pages regarding Maddie?
I just saw that ad and felt cold, i thought it was me being a bit too sensitive but obviously not. and as for some of the previous comments , yes the world is still turning, no Maddie isn't the only girl to ever go missing, but if people take the glib attitute you have shown, then god please help us because it sounds like 'you' have all stopped caring .


hope you get home safely maddie
Reply:Oh get a grip - I'm sure Maddies parents have a lot more on their minds than what Y! put on their news pages.
Reply:Get a grip on yourself, you act like she is the only little girl that has ever been lost. Don't get me wrong I hope she is found alive and well and this story is getting a lot of attention, so like I said get a grip on yourself.
Reply:show some prove
Reply:I haven't seen it, hey the world is still turning!
Reply:All I can see is a Big mac advert, this is on UK Yahoo.


But yes it's not on, Yahoo please move it!!!
Reply:that's absolutely disgusting.....i'm lost for words..Yahoo remove the sick picture....this is not funny....
Reply:the people at yahoo are not known for their common sense.
Reply:Star from me well spotted and you did the right thing trying to bring attention to it. oh and take no notice of those criticising, anything of support is better than nothing.
Reply:Yahoo being of American extraction aren't all that interested in what goes on in Portugal, children or not, and more importantly, they're getting PAID for carrying that advert ! ! !
Reply:I thought exactly the same thing. Let's hope that the Yahoo! people spot your question and take steps.


I'm giving you a star in the hope it might attract their attention, I ask other 'answerers' to do the same, please!